Just Needed To Share vol. 16

"oh jeez he's not going to talk about being broke and jobless again is he?"

yes he is.

this has been the longest, most aggravating July ever. my anger peaked last week with several meltdowns culminating in what was perhaps the angriest show the Communion ever performed.

i'm at a loss again. i have 16 dollars in my wallet. i'm supposed to chip in for the studio rent, and i have no idea how i'm going to get any of it. i don't expect or wish for pity or even understanding, cause i know no one gives a shit...i know few are really pulling for me...everyone's got their own problems.

i can't sell anything, cause all anyone can afford is gas, food, and rent. those things have consumed all attentions and funds, leaving little to no room for a good DVD or a quality CD or a good book or a cathartic show... which is going to do more damage to our collective psyche then most are willing to admit. if all people are doing is working to keep food in their belly or fuel in the car or roofs above their heads, then there is no room for dreams...for fantasy... for hope. Those are found in films, books, music, shows.... they help us unwind, enable us to tap into our sub-conscious, and maybe even learn something about ourselves and the world around us. Necessity is important of course, but those things are in their own way a necessity...for our souls. for our sanity. Maybe it's just me, but pumping gas or eating a cheeseburger doesn't give me the same joy as watching Cemetery Man or discovering the music of Rose Kemp, the Paper Chase, or Infernal Stronghold and buying their respective records. That kind of happiness has been put aside and all we're left with is vague priorities that only serve to satisfy base level reptilian impulses.

Culture has become anemic. The imagination has been deadened. Big Business is knifing the intellectual like it was Kitty Genovese, and we're all just watching it happen and saying nothing... turning up the vulgar talk radio, anesthetizing ourselves with reality television, bad food, and cheap beer, covering our ears until so we can get to work in the morning and perpetuate routines, making sure rich people don't loose any money so we can get some of their table leavings and fashion some sort of quasi-bearable living from the scraps of their splendorous orgy.

Just needed to share.