Saturday, November 28, 2009

We are the Sprocket Holes vol. 118

less than large/more than tiny movie reviews;

POP SKULL - 8/10: An epileptic fit of subconscious sadism. The days in the non-life of a blank voiced pillhead as he deals with the end of his relationships and the bloody visions snaking from the corners of his eyes to smother iris and traverse pupil to claw at his brain-stem and drain his nervous system of its boiling fluid so they have something with which to scald the earth. That being said, the film is woefully mislabeled by the company releasing the DVD, which has chosen to focus on the horror elements of the story (which are mostly concentrated in some of the imagery/most of the lighting/soundtrack) and not its experimental nature. POP SKULL is more Lodge Kerrigan than Lucio Fulci, so just be aware of that.

G.I. JOE: RISE OF COBRA - Cobra!!!! Retreeeeeeat! / REE-TREEEEEEEAT!!!!! : This movie raped me. a non-russian accented Baroness and a Miami coke dealer with a super soaker claiming to be Storm Shadow tied me to a chair, covered my head with Snake Eyes's mask (complete with a superfluous sculpted mouth), and had a scabby version of the kid from 30 Rock from the Sun (he said he was Cobra Commander, but don't believe him) scud my prostate with an 15 inch long 11 inch thick cast iron dildo in the shape of a Cobra only with a stupid CGI Destro head at the tip, so it could vomit robot ticks and overdone Scottish cadence straight to my heart, fucker. That's what this movie did to me. now you know........ and knowing is half the battle!

knowing and ass-rape.

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